THE TANTRUM CLUB – how throwing a tantrum is just exactly what a woman needs

Adele Theron will be holding a free talk entitled ‘THE TANTRUM CLUB – how throwing a tantrum is just exactly what a woman needs’ on the Activia Expert Stage on Sunday 30th September at 12pm.

THE TANTRUM CLUB – how throwing a tantrum is just exactly what a woman needs

“I will transform the speaking area into an interactive environment (with bean bags/ bats etc) for people to totally go crazy and throw a tantrum

· Emotional Intelligence and why it’s killing us women in today’s society· Find out why throwing a tantrum is healthy and healing

· Expression of emotion is the key to vitality

· Put on some goggles, take hold of a baseball bat and allow yourself to let rip and throw a tantrum with a big group of ladies

· Toss out suppression and bring in expression”

For more information visit www.nakeddivorce.com

TICKETS:
You can can purchase your ticket for £6, saving 25% * Quote TANTRUM when booking atwww.VitalityLive.co.uk
*Saving based on door price. Booking and transaction fees apply.

Location:  Vitality Boutique, Bluewater, Greenhithe, Kent, DA9 9SG, United Kingdom

Instant Gratification BUT what IS best for me? PART II

 

As human beings we can tend to become fascinated by ourselves and our stories and can allow ourselves to become too self-indulgent and it can be destructive. As long as we recognise the vision of where we want and need to be and what it takes to get there, the time that you determine it to take is essentially up to you.

But first consider that Instant gratification may be more helpful and suited to you then you realise. Instant gratification does not mean instantly healed. Because we all know emotional pain takes hard work to overcome and it will takesome time. But it instead means instant heal–ING, where automatically healing starts to take place and instant rewards begin to reap, when you pull all your focus intensely to healing without anything else in your way.

Renowned UK psychotherapist Nea Clark (http://www.balancedbusinessladies.com/) says “there is no need to indulge your feelings over a long period of time. Time doesn’t heal them. Better to do a program like the Naked Divorce and focus intensively on healing within a defined period of time. It’s healthier for your mind but also for your body.”

Independent surveys conducted by the stress society of the United Kingdom have also shown that those who take a very proactive approach to healing lead happier lives.

We all want to lead happy lives, some will fight harder for it than others but whether you want instant gratification or long term strategy sounds more inviting to you, the same principles apply in needing to confront your emotions and take actions.

Different people have different tolerances and obviously different personalities. Some will have more patience for Therapy and “healing process’s” than others will.

Some people may have terrible patience in traffic, but waiting patiently for something that they know will be worthwhile comes naturally to them. Others on the other hand may be completely calm in traffic yet not want to take any time other than urgently necessary waiting for healing to happen. But in popular agreeance we all want to detract from the pain. We all have a story to tell and if admitted or not, we want to be heard and understood.

Complacency and sacrifice is a poisonous combination when applied to your well-being in the process of a Divorce. We aren’t here to simply survive, but to thrive. Surviving through life is no way to live, settling and accepting thorns in your flesh is no intelligent approach to your situation of any break up. You deserve more and you owe it to yourself to be stop being complacent and to fight for gratification. I’m not talking about revenge and fighting your ex but fighting for your dignity and integrity back. Becoming confident and finding strength again through taking action and overcoming what heartbreaks life has thrown your way.

Therapists, friends, colleagues and even family may tell you it will take a long time to heal. People are just people and when the phrase “TIME heals all wounds” is constantly drilled into our skulls it’s sometimes difficult to imagine other possibilities. When people have experienced a long term way of healing they will perhaps try to prepare you for what they experienced, but everyone is different and I believe that anyone if you put your mind to it and combined with the Right support and direction, you can heal in a more rapid time than you ever expected.

All in all, find what’s best for you and start your new steps forward. Try the naked divorce programme – which has been specially designed to help you along your way!

Till next time

Lots of hugs

Instant Gratification vs. a Long term Strategy… what’s best? PART I

Instant rewards and instant healing has a much nicer ring to it, then the words combined; LONG – TERM. However if waiting that particular extended time will further HELP in the long run it stirs the question if waiting is more worthwhile. But how do you determine what works best for you?

When associating this with Divorce, 99% of People want to get out of their pain as soon as they possibly can and get on with their life. They want any existing void or despair that has crept into their heart to be removed. But removing pain and despair is not connected to AVOIDING it. It is so important to guard yourself against hiding behind different issues, for example, your work, your children or other people’s problem’s as an excuse for not facing your own. This will result in not healing from your divorce. Diversion and keeping yourself busy with other things will not help you in any way it will only further multiply the time it will take to heal.

Deflecting never brings satisfaction. Your issues may have been avoided for a time but all the while they will bubble under the surface until eventually they boil over the top and burn more than it ever should have if you had first confronted the issues.

Therapy and traditional healing practices have based their disciplines on the premise that you need time to heal.

“Long term strategy” The concept of needing time to heal is consequently so ingrained in our society that challenging this notion is usually met with an extraordinary amount of resistance and in some cases even anger or dismissal. The thought of healing quickly feels fake, shallow or unbelievable and could be misconstrued as a trivialization of the healing process.

This is an understandable reaction, especially from people who have experienced such dramatic heartache and taken an extraordinary time to heal in those circumstances, but it raises my question or perhaps my opinion that it doesn’t NEED to take a LONG time to emotionally heal, not if the problem is faced correctly and strategically.  As I have said before I do not believe TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS… Time simply passes by, it’s what we do with our lives while the time is passing that either helps us, heals us or locks us in our past.

What happens with a lot of people when they take time to heal is they become complacent, resigned and in reality… lazy. Over time the urgency to take action dissipates. And people can become desensitized to their situation and tend to “settle” for certain ways or habits, and tolerate more than they should or ever would have if they had first taken action pro actively.  Because if you live with something for so long, you can become “used to it” and no longer feel the urgency to take any action because you know you can withstand it as you’ve proved so far, so why change it now, why bother?

This kind of desensitized attitude is the danger in a long term strategy, it is not an accurate way in overcoming and dealing with that heartache you long to defeat.

However A long term strategy if correctly dealt with, does not need to be a negative thing. If you are making movement towards healing and dealing with your emotions but simply taking an extended time to do so, each to his own, and more power to you for knowing what works for you.

You just need to make sure that if you like taking your time to heal that it is not just an excuse for lingering in your self-pity. It is necessary to grieve and allow yourself to heal by all means! In fact it is vital that you do, but it is essential you ensure that it is just a selected time and not elongated, therefore distracting you from your need to move on.

Stay tuned for PART II…

Till next time!

Lots of hugs